Blonde Reporting for Duty

And not, as it turns out, endangered. Yippee!

Notes from the Highlighted

I am most honored to be invited to this big blonde blog, as I have lately begged my stylist to put more bleach in my hair. I hope to contribute to this rant/journal as strongly as a million blonde highlights in direct sunlight.

That's all for now...

Ain't No Time Like The Present

Despite hair-pulling about the lack of female voices (namely, ours), it has taken a while for the inaugural Blonde Journal rant to appear on this site. I hoped to avoid being the first contributor, but then I saw this.

Have you ever wondered what Jack Shafer looks like? I don't really know, but I've always had a picture in my mind. He's somewhere in between Pat Robertson and a garden gnome. Don't get me wrong, I agree with him sometimes. Just not this time.

Shame on me-- going for the low blow with Shafer's appearance. Bad, hypocritical feminist. There are more important things in life. Such as learning from Jack Shafer's hard-hitting commentary. "It's clear that many female newscasters lie about their true hair color every time they appear on television." Wow, Jack. Uncovering the media's true deceptions, shaded as they are (tell me, Jack): "bombshell blonde", "sunny blonde", "brassy blonde", "dark-rooted" and, of course, "dangerous blonde". Including Lou Dobbs in the list is not enough to save Jack Shafer-- there's too much ass to cover here.

Don't get me wrong; if I looked in the mirror and saw Rita Cosby's rosy cheeks instead of my own, I'd scream, "EEK! Shameless-hussy hair-color!" and run back to bed, one hand owning the thumb I'd be sucking, the other speed-dialing my colorist. But that doesn't make her a bad journalist, does it Jack? I mean fascinating, even relevant, maybe, except I'm not sure her hair has anything to do, actually, with her job as a reporter. No, not very much. Not so much about Rita, not so much about media, not so much about news. Not so much to do with... hardly anything, really.

I won't claim to have never judged the appearances of public women, but Jack, come on. A slideshow?

If this is media commentary, when are we going to attack the overuse of hair gel by young male fiction prodigies? Because I want to see that.


Love,
Spillah

P.S. Katie Couric and Greta van Susteren are not really all that blonde.

P.P.S. In case you don't believe me about the hair gel thing, just take a look at this, and this, and, I'm sorry to say, this.